Warning, this was written when in a very low place so for any with depression this may become a trigger. (I do not want to ruin anyone’s day so thought a warning might be better 🙂 ) and for those who may get concerned I have climbed up a bit from down there 🙂 I find writing poems helps express how i feel even to myself. I must say I was shocked to read this back and realise just how low i get.
Is keeping from you just how low I feel, lying?
Should I open up fully or is that just offloading?
I know you want to be there for me, but how much can you deal with?
When you have you own worries. How much can you give?
I try to tell you just what’s needed. Not dwell on the pain
Keep things to basics avoid opening a vein
I don’t want the feelings to bleed out of me
Feelings that would worry, as you’d know I’m not free
Free to make choices of what I will and won’t do
No. I am a prisoner till the illness is through
Is hiding all of this really such a bad thing?
Where does sharing end and offloading begin?
If I can’t face myself, due to guilt and the hate,
Then does It mean I should share or try and change my fate?