Struggling to find the motivation

I feel suddenly very alone

Spending so many days around people

The house now feels far too quiet

My mind starts to wander

 

Never a good thing for it

Gravitates towards the darkness

The places in my mind where

Each thought spirals me down

 

It becomes such a dark hole

That I often get trapped down there

My mind returning again and again

To how pathetic my life truly is

 

The day is cloudy and cold

No sunshine to bring me energy

My muscles feel stiff and slow

Each movement is more of an effort

 

I sit here alone counting down

Counting the hours left before

I won’t be alone anymore

I don’t really live in these moments

 

My life seems to be on pause

My days go past with little to

Distinguish them or give any interest

I feel so drained of all motivation

 

The cold starts to send me shivers

I know I should move for a blanket

It seems stupid to feel cold in June

What happened to the sunshine and warmth?

 

My body only wants to sleep

I try to stay awake and do something

Anything to feel a bit more alive

But more time passes and still I sit.

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6 thoughts on “Struggling to find the motivation

  1. Now, you see, I like being alone. I find my own company rewarding. I figure that if I don’t like my own company then there’s no particular reason why anybody else should. It’s when other people turn up that I get agitated. They always interrupt whatever I’m doing.

    1. I usually like peace and quite but after a few days with my nieces its a very great contrast and i think until i got started on my writing i felt a bit alone.

  2. Try sitting on an exercise ball. At least that way you can bounce at the same time. I use an exercise ball as my computer chair and love to bounce on it. I count it as exercise. Bouncing always makes me feel better when I’m feeling down.

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